Talking to my mom this evening while I walked to the dance, I came to this sudden realization...I feel like having depression is unhealthy.
Unhealthy. Huh. I said it before I really understood what I was saying, and it hit me - this FITS. Pieces fell together like the end of Free Cell on automatic card-fly-up-to-Aces mode.
Depression is considered a mental disease. Ah, there's the rub: disease = sick = unhealthy. Right? Well, mental disease is different as their is no cure, no "getting well." (Well, at least not without a constant stream of medication.) But you see more clearly where my fight comes from now? I've always been healthy - as a child, as an adult. I do not often get sick. And when I do, I get very impatient while I wait for all the "sick" to go away. But, I can't fight this like a cold or the flu.
So, a recap, of sorts, on how I feel about my depression:
- The feeling of being broken... "broken" = sick, weak, unhealthy
- The desire to be normal... "normal" = healthy, ridden with disease
- Having control... "having control" = having the ability to be cured, made healthy again
- Saying goodby to me... I see "me" as a healthy individual, but winter changes "me" to unhealthy.
I am an everyday person. A face in the crowd. Perhaps you've even passed me on the street. And I have depression. This is a collection of my experiences coping with depression on a daily basis. A chronicle of the life of my depression, if you will. But it is also a forum through which I fight current social stigmas and taboos about depression and mental illness. Please comment and share with the world out there. It's important.
About Me
- Nina
- I'm an avid swing dancer, a proud Minnesotan by birth, and I've got a soft spot for Boston. I love anything British, used bookstores, and delicious smells emanating from the kitchen.
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